Saturday, September 6, 2014

FET in motion

My hysteroscopy was uneventful. The RE found a few polyps near the cervix and an overall thick lining. This was on August 26, so I have been on pelvic restrictions (BOO!). I am still on BC pills and begin lupron injections on September 12. I see the RE for an ultrasound and blood work on September 19 (I assume it is the 3 day workup since I stop BC pill on the 16th). Other than this, I am in the dark as to what the schedule for transfer will be. I am assuming mid October, but we'll see.

The question that has been weighing me down in how many to transfer. This is our last shot. Financially, doling out $4000 is not something we can do again anytime soon, and I do not want to keep waiting to get preggo. It's now (nowish) or we are done; I am done trying, hoping, thinking, planning. I want this stage of my fertility to be happening or to be done. I'll be 40 in January, so hopefully 40 is the last age I'll be pregnant.

I feel so fortunate that IVF #1 worked and gave us A in September 2011. Then a surprise BFP gave us O in May 2013. I have more than hit the jackpot. I am the luckiest person alive, really. But we have 5 top quality frosties from the IVF #1 and I feel like I need to give it a shot. I am sure that the RE is going to insist on 2 being put back, but twins, triplets (one splitting)...scares me. I don't want this FET and its success to take away from the two kids I already have. I just can't even imagine how hard it will be to have multiples while parenting a one and three year old (and holding a full time job). DH thinks we should put two back, but when I said "Oh, you are ready to have twins?" He made the worst noise, almost in disgust. I told him "If you don't want twins, we shouldn't put two back."

And then I think, whatever happens, we'll deal. We will do it. We will survive, because honestly, these past few years, for me, is what parenting means. It's about so much but one is just surviving the day, the hour, getting to nap time, getting to 8:00 o'clock (bedtime).

And then I think we could put one, two, or even three back and NONE implant. And frankly, that scares me the most.

1 comment:

Francie said...

For what it's worth, I transferred two on the two cycles that I actually got pregnant. I regret choosing a single transfer my first IVF. I'm surprised your RE would advise to transfer one, especially with 5 frosties and you over 35. I say transfer 2.