Saturday, July 16, 2011

What a difference a year makes

Last night, I got the text that my friend had her baby. This is the same friend who got married last August. She got knocked up pretty quickly, and we were all thrilled for her. I felt even more thrilled for her because she is my age. Jealous, yes, but thrilled nonetheless.

A year ago, I was finishing up my last unsuccessful IUI and feeling quite alone and afraid. Today, I am enjoying the backaches as I grade my papers. I am feeling the kicks and movements of this creature inside of me. I am feeling, dare I say it, like I am pregnant and am going to have a baby. With extreme confidence, actually. I'm not sure where the fear went, but I am calm and happy. Today I am 32w3d.

I went to a cloth diapering class offered by the local natural parenting boutique this morning. I thought I was informed before this, but now I feel like AHHH!! There are so many options to choose from: two-parts, pocket, all in ones, hybrids, one size, fitted. Ahhh! I had no idea, really. It is a lot to digest, but I know for sure that I intend to cloth diaper and feel as though I have resources and a place to go with questions.

In the afternoon, I dropped by prental yoga and enjoyed each moment. When I used to do work-study, I cleaned right after the saturday afternoon class. It was hard to see all those pregnant women leaving class. Sometimes it would really hurt and I'd sweep, mop, and dust my way through the bitterness and anxiety of my infertility. I think I realized for the first time that today, I am one of those pregnant ladies.

Oh, and for those of you who are struggling with back issues, the belly bra works wonders for me. Ok, it's not called the belly bra, but it basically lifts and holds your belly up, relieving the pressure. It's ugly, but it is helping.

8 comments:

Kari said...

Whoo hoo!! Enjoy!! You're almost there. It's great to have a resource for cloth diapers. They're great!! We started with tiny gDiapers right in the hospital and used gDiapers for the first few months. Then we went to Flip covers with gCloth. For us it's been the best system. Great for travel since we can use disposables while out and about. Good luck!!

tishi said...

So glad to hear your feeling confident and happy.....even with the backache. I can finally say too that I'm feeling quite confident and happy at nearly 37 weeks....even with the insomnia. We went with cloth diapers too, that was a whole lot to take in!!

Allison said...

Awesome. Simply awesome, CJ. (((Hugs!)))

Ashley said...

So glad you are in a good place!

erika said...

You have an amazing, life changing year behind you. So many things, so many great things!!! and so many more to come:)
I will be interested in following up on your cloth diaper research. I am thinking pockets, and try to find out more about the brands.
Belly bra - something I will certainly look into!
Yay! for the single digit countdown:)

uneggsplained said...

'Jealous but thrilled' you are awesome! I think all I felt at that time in my life was pure jealousy. Congrats to your friend! So happy that the fear is gone and you are able to enjoy this special time :)

Alex said...

Love your attitude - you're so close! Can't wait to hear about your adventures with cloth diapers.

My Infertile Confessions said...

The countdown is on!!! I wish I was feeling as calm as you! For some reason, I have began feeling scared... of the delivery!