Friday, August 13, 2010

CD 29, IVF consult a bust!

So we basically walked out of our consult after waiting in the consult room for 45 minutes with no doctor!! WTF? Firstly, we drove through tropical depression style rains, dodging puddles of water and asshole drivers, then we sat in the waiting room for 15 minutes past our appointment time, then we were whisked away to the consult room where we waited for 45 minutes. DH has to get to work, and I had enough of the waiting!!!! Grrr...So I went to the nurses station where they were all chatting it up and asked to be rescheduled for another time. Grrrr....I know Dr. S was there because I heard her, but why can't they come in periodically to let us know it will be a few more minutes. Grrr....



I got the packet, though, and the magic number for this clinic is just under 10k for IVF, not including the STD testing and the like we have to go through before we can begin. WTF? Why didn't we have to do all this testing before like when we were getting IUIs? Oh, and what, like 3-4K for meds? WTF!!!!

India IVF is beginning to look real attractive now.

Or maybe it is just this: I am almost 36 and I have never been pregnant. I am a lone fucking infertile with little hope, feeling discarded today by the doctor and the nurses and even DH, and maybe it IS true what they say about natural selection and that I am not meant to reproduce because I should just die off. And maybe DH can go get himself another fucking lay who is much younger and he can reproduce for free, and maybe this whole fucking "business" of getting pregnant is just not for me. Maybe it is.

Fuck!

10 comments:

Kitty said...

Oh honey (((HUGS))) I'm so, so sorry. It's criminal how much IVF costs. What about a loan, or help from your family? You are not alone!! (((More Hugs)))

My attempt at humor:
It's not natural selection. My acu told me being that we're at the top of the food chain, human beings, like other predators, are not very good breeders (if we were, prey would get too scarce to support the species). So that proves to me that Infertiles are at the TOP of the top of the food chain. It's not that we're not fit for survival, we're just so smart and cunning that if we could breed freely we'd definintely run out of food and die out.

Circus Princess said...

Bull shit! You having to wait and not even see the RE! Bull crap! IVF costing an arm and a leg! And finally bullocks! Natural selection can kiss my butt!

Anonymous said...

Gah! I'm so sorry the consult turned out like that! I hate being left to wait and 45 minutes is crazy without any update as to why!

I think getting pregnant IS for you. I just wish it wasn't so freaking hard! Hope today gets better...big hugs!

Jill said...

Ok, deep breath. First, natural selection obviously does not apply to humans. Do we really think nature would select crack whores and lazy wellfare bitches popping out ten kids? No, we don't. I swear the smarter a woman is the harder it is to get pregnant. UNFAIR. Hang in there, I hope and pray your baby is coming soon. And maybe going to another country isn't such a bad idea. I hear good things about that working for people for far less money. I hope you're feeling better soon.

Allison said...

Hey, whoa.... that last paragraph better be just a hissy fit to get that noise out of your head, because I will not stand for one of my bloggie girls beating herself up so thoroughly.

You are NOT just supposed to shrivel up and die and your husband loves YOU and not You-As-Only-A-Potential-Baby-Machine. And although there's no picture of you and we've never met, I'm sure you're a hot piece of ass and he doesn't need NOBODY ELSE.

The whole spending-money-to-get-what-others-get-for-free thing sucks ass. I'll give ya that.

((((Hugs))))) Hope your day gets better.

Alex said...

Are you f'ing kidding me that the doc didn't show up? Unbeleivable. 3-4K for medis isn't surprising - it sucks.

I'm so sorry you had such a shitty IF day!!!

none said...

Don't give up.. you're almost there! I did all the stupid treatments that didn't work between ages 33-36. Nothing but BFNs.. not even a chemical pregnancy. Then the wonderful world of IVF, starting at age 37. (You know my story.) You're just getting to the good stuff. ((hugs))

Kari said...

Ok I am so pissed that doctor stood you up. Total BS. The natural selection argument that people offer to help explain why some people suffer from IF is total flippin BS. I'm 100% sure that your husband isn't interested in finding someone else he can have a baby for free with. Try to hang in there, I know it's difficult. The craptastic feelings that go along with IF are not fun. IVF is an amazing answer for a lot of people's IF problem. Good luck and I hope that you have found a support group, or message board with women who have done international IVF and can give you some great information. ((BIG HUGS)) and hoping happier feelings find you soon!!

Anonymous said...

WTF?? I cannot believe the gall of some of these doctors!! It's as if only their time is important. Sheesh!

I actually kinda understand what you are saying about natural selection. They are stupid, fruitless thoughts that I have all the time. Perhaps I am just not supposed to procreate...

But who cares about nature, right?? Gotta keep trying. I hope your rescheduled consult goes better!

Panamahat said...

So sorry you had such a rough day. x