Yes, I've been hiding

with nothing good to report. I had a major meltdown on Sunday when it became clear that AF was on her way. I mean major meltdown, like throw away all fertility goodies including CBE monitor, strips, preg tests, pre-seed, you name it. And DH got wind of this and tried to stop me, telling me that I was just PMSing. Oh lordy, wrong thing to say because it wasn't that; it was pure and utter sadness, disappointment, hopelessness. I am not sure exactly what this all means (my freak out- blow up and all), but I am truly truly exhausted and tired of TTC running my every thought. So I might be MIA for awhile, but I promise to try to keep lurking, reading, and commenting. Sometimes it's all too much, ya know?

CD18 7DPO, dip-see-doodle

I'm back to my old tricks again--damn you, fertili.ty friend and your chart comparison thingie. My temp dropped this morning, still above the coverline, but .4 degrees from the normal post ovulation temps. So I scoured FF's chart gallery, looking for a chart like mine that got a BFP. Some did, some did not. Then I googled the piss out of implantation dip and got positive and negative info. Why am I doing this you ask? Oh yeah, because I am nutso. And also because I have (no lie) 8 loads of laundry to get done tonight. Why tonight? Because three of those are yoga towels (I do laundry for my yoga studio as a trade), I have no clean undies, and DH needs white t-shirts for work tomorrow. Yes, last weekend's birthday extravaganza left me slacking on the clothes. In addition, I should be cleaning up the house a bit since we have a showing tomorrow at noon! So much to do, and yet FF keeps pulling me closer.

Enough of the craziness here. I already told you all I'm getting knocked up this month (hahaha). Why am I even stressing about any of this?

In happier news, DH and I were invited to a Mardi Gras ball. We've known about this for months and months, but of course silly-me-slacker-hopeful-to-get-preggers didn't buy a dress until earlier this week, and thank goodness I found something. Actually, I found TWO dresses at a consignment store for a grand total of $113. I couldn't decide between the maroon flowy floor length one with strappy straps OR the kick-ass contemporary strapless black floor length ballgown. I think I am leaning towards the strapless black one. The ball is February 6, which (if you are all following along here) would be 15 DPO. So since I will be pregnant for the ball (hahaha I can't stop with the craziness), I'll probably be the only sober one at the party (which, ahem, I am totally alright about).

Come'on little egglet--I know you got fertilized--you just need to implant right about now.

CD 15, you mean it's not a good sign?

So, turns out that ovulation pain is not a good sign of fertility according to TCM. Hmmm...how can eastern and western medicine be at odds with this? Dr. A told me that ovulation pain suggests stagnation. Oh, BTW, stagnation has become my middle name I suppose. My acupuncture appointment today was calming at best. I was not given any herbs for this second part of my cycle, so we'll see. I was truly hoping for the secret potion that would make this all be one BFP soon, but I guess not even TCM can promise that.

I am still feeling very positive. My dietary changes really have made me feel better. I am less tired even though I am so busy with the new semester. In addition, my list of ingredients is even more manageable now that I learned to use amarynth instead of white rice to make sushi. Trust me, I do miss a big ol' fat cheeseburger, though.

And fries. And meatloaf. And chips. And booze!!!

CD 11, TMI post

Friday was CD 11 for me, and low and behold, my 35th birthday. Here's how my day went:

6:00: woke up, POS for fertility monitor---says I am peaking!!! wooh hoo because we have been BD every day since CD 7, so lots of boys swimming around.

9:00-1:00: Teaching

1:30~ Come home, go up to the bedroom to pack and WOOOOSH, a whole lotta CM came pouring our, really watery, and a bit of spotting. I checked it out, called DH upstairs, and we did the deed. The woosh of liquid really felt like a sign.

4:00~ drive out of town to a little place up north to spend the night. In the car, I am feeling massive O pains. I notice that there is a good amount of pink blood in my CM. This reminds me of pre-lap/hysteroscopy mid-cycle bleeding~~the kind my OB told me was a good sign but others said was probably due to the polyps. I am feeling anxious and antsy.

6:00~~ Still some O pains, but I am too excited to care since we are headed out on the town for a little birthday dinner. I stop taking the herbs per TCM protocol. Dr. A said I should halt the use of the current herbs once I feel/know I have O'd. Also, I stop doing the acupressure, too.

The rest of the evening was pure fun and enjoyment. I love staying in hotels if only for the pool! Happy 35th. Maybe some magic happened that day.

Yesterday I temped a bit late and it was around 98.0, and today I was at 98.1, a clear sign that I ovulated. Hoooraaay!

Mid-cycle bleeding has pretty much ceased, too.

Egg, meet sperm. Sperm, meet egg. Now, fertilize. I'd make a great Mom.

ICLW week, hello y'all

Welcome to the blog; I am getting pregnant this month. hahaha

Really. I am trying.


Been TTC for a few years,and have just recently begun traditional chinese medicine (TCM) as the first step in my fertility treatments post lap/hysteroscopy, although clo.mid is next on the table if we decide. I'm a one tube-working kinda gal. That's my diagnosis.

I turn 35 this Saturday, so I won't be around that day, but I promise to double up on my commenting as soon as I am back in town. Cheers!

Acupucture and acupressure

Last night was my third appointment with my TCM doctor, and she showed me a couple of places to administer acupressure. Find the webbed part of your hand between your thumb and forefinger, then move up slightly to the meaty part. There. Now, apply pressure either in pulses or one long hold for one minute, switching hands, and doing this twice daily. This should be uncomfortable a bit. She said this point, along with one above the anklebone but not on the leg bone, has been shown to cause the uterus to contract a bit, enhancing blood flow and almost acting like a suction for implantation. I am to do this every time we BD and twice daily until I see/know that I have ovulated. This acupressure point is contraindicated in pregnancy, though.

CD 8 and my temps are still low, OPK monitor is at "high."

Hope you all are well. I am trying to stay upbeat and energetic, although I expect to be crazy again now that the spring semester is underway. A new cycle has begun on that front, too. New students, new material, and a new attitude. I love the beginning of a semester. There's always so much promise, impending let-downs, and surprises. I hope my own personal cycle shows me some surprises this month, too.

CD6, this one is gonna be the big one

hahaha here's to positive thinking.

So today is CD6 and already my OPK monitor is saying that I am at a high level. Hmmm... that's pretty early. Also, I am trekking along here with the TCM, monitoring my food intake, feeling so very hungry and not satisfied most of the time. And cold. And I have had headaches since my first acupuncture appointment. I don't know what the heck is going on with me. I attributed the headaches first to quitting coffee, PMS, and then maybe the weather changes here, but every day? My head hurt so much on Thursday that I left school at 1:00 and went to get a massage. My shoulders were really crunchy and he said that I had a lot of tension.

Yesterday, while watching the afternoon football game and shredding mucho paperwork, I was shivering, chattering my teeth and all, and it wasn't even cold outside or in my home. I also had a nasty whole head headache, so I took a hot hot bath and soaked for almost 45 minutes. I felt a ton better after that.

Am I detoxing? Is my body freeing its Qi? What the heck is going on with me? Maybe some of this is in my head, but after the bath and after still feeling hungry, I ordered a pizza and pigged out. I have an appointment with TCM Monday evening, and I plan to ask a ton of questions. Today (so far), I am headache-less, so that I good news. \

Here's the deal: I am getting pregnant this month. There, I said it. Out loud. Yes, everyone. This is the month. Now, back to munching on some quinoa.

Woot!